YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
It's never too late to be topless.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
All I want is dick and wine.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
