He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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