i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
