he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
