You're so nebulous sometimes
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
