found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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