i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
