Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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