it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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