i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
well you can't waste a boner
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize