The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
