She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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