This is the prime rib incident all over again
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Randomize
