maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
