Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
