I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
im holly from the hills drunk
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Randomize
