Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
