U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
