And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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