I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
