Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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