Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
