Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
