I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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