when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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