I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
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