Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
