In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
