He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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