yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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