Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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