is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
