white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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