So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize