Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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