Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
