Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize