I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
God, I missed his penis.
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