rhymes with "ouble enetration"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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