kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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