check it out our google latitudes are spooning
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'm both gender and math confused
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
