I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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