I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Randomize