I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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