I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
