What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
