he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
