I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Randomize
