therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize