Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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