Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Randomize
